Question: Should I Ditch Her on Prom Night?
Last Friday a girl I know texted me, asking me to prom. I'm not really attracted to her but she's nice. She's also asked me to every major dance since sophomore year, and every time I had a valid reason not to go. So I told her "yes" since I didn't have the heart to say no.
Well, yesterday my Air Force recruiter called me and told me I have a mandatory drill meeting this Saturday, and it's an all-day event 150 miles away. Now I have to either risk my career in the AF or crush this girl's heart. I don't know what to do. Especially since prom is this weekend and I'd have to break the news to her on such short notice.
Well, yesterday my Air Force recruiter called me and told me I have a mandatory drill meeting this Saturday, and it's an all-day event 150 miles away. Now I have to either risk my career in the AF or crush this girl's heart. I don't know what to do. Especially since prom is this weekend and I'd have to break the news to her on such short notice.
Answer: I’m a little on the fence about this. On the one hand, your recruiter is wrong to insist on your attendance at this meeting with such short notice. (What if you actually wanted to go to prom? What if it was your graduation day?) On the other hand, this girl was pretty late in asking you, too, so it's not as though she's been counting on you for months.
Your first step is to ask your recruiter if there’s any flexibility with the drill meeting. Is there at all a possibility that you could attend for the first half of the day, and then book it back to your town in time for prom? If you attended only part of it, would there be a way to make up for the rest of it at a later date? And if not - if you were to miss it altogether - would it really, truly affect your Air Force career? I mean, your recruiter might try to spook you into attending, but how vital is this one meeting, anyway?
If there’s no flexibility at all, then you'll probably need to go to your meeting. Prom night with a pity date isn't exactly worth blowing your career with the armed forces.
Bite the bullet and explain the whole situation to your prom date as soon as you can. Yes, she’ll be crushed, but you’ve made your choice. Soften the blow by finding some other guys (maybe some friends or relatives of yours) who'd be interested in taking your place as her date. Given that you're not that into her to begin with, she'll probably have an equally good time with another guy anyway.
Good luck – let me know how it goes!
xo,
Holly
Note: this was a real question that a real person emailed to me! (It's been edited a little for the purposes of this article.) If you want to ask me and the rest of the Teen Advice community your own question, come visit the Teen Advice forum.
Your first step is to ask your recruiter if there’s any flexibility with the drill meeting. Is there at all a possibility that you could attend for the first half of the day, and then book it back to your town in time for prom? If you attended only part of it, would there be a way to make up for the rest of it at a later date? And if not - if you were to miss it altogether - would it really, truly affect your Air Force career? I mean, your recruiter might try to spook you into attending, but how vital is this one meeting, anyway?
If there’s no flexibility at all, then you'll probably need to go to your meeting. Prom night with a pity date isn't exactly worth blowing your career with the armed forces.
Bite the bullet and explain the whole situation to your prom date as soon as you can. Yes, she’ll be crushed, but you’ve made your choice. Soften the blow by finding some other guys (maybe some friends or relatives of yours) who'd be interested in taking your place as her date. Given that you're not that into her to begin with, she'll probably have an equally good time with another guy anyway.
Good luck – let me know how it goes!
xo,
Holly
Note: this was a real question that a real person emailed to me! (It's been edited a little for the purposes of this article.) If you want to ask me and the rest of the Teen Advice community your own question, come visit the Teen Advice forum.