When a person has developed an addiction some of the early warning signs listed above may suddenly disappear. As an addict becomes aware of the problems their drug or alcohol use is causing in their life they will seek to compensate by hiding things from their friends and family. While they may not be able to hide the drug or alcohol use itself they will often, even subconsciously, take steps to hide the effects of their habit. Some signs that an addiction is reaching a breaking point.
- the addict will start lying about obvious things (for example, lying about the frequency of use or lying about being drunk or high when it is obvious that they are),
- the addict may experience broad mood swings, moments of happiness followed by extreme downs or the reverse (for example, they may seem really happy one minute and then suddenly and without an obvious reason they may become angry or withdrawn),
- the addict won’t want to talk about using drugs or alcohol (for example, they will withdraw from a conversation if their drug or alcohol use is mentioned),
- the addict may have drastic changes in their habits or appearance (for example, they may give up old grooming habits, drastically change their outward appearance, quit clubs or teams they play on, or give up other favorite activities),
- the addict may start hanging out with new friends, friends who are a better fit with their new lifestyle and who would be less likely to question their drug or alcohol use (for example, a once socially active teen may become a loner or start hanging out with a crowd from a different school),
- the addict will start using at other times that can no longer be labeled as “social using” (for example, they may get high at lunch time or alone during the day),
- the addict may start cycling drugs (for example, partying all night with alcohol then taking an upper pill the next day to deal with the hangover),
- the addict may start stealing in order to feed their habit; drug use can get expensive!
Helping an Addicted Friend
If you think that a friend may be struggling with an addiction the best thing you can do for them is go to their parents. Do not try to get them help on your own. Addicts can be very crafty people and covering up their addiction quickly becomes part of their lifestyle. They get very good at fooling people and if they can’t fool people they quickly cut those people out of their lives. While it is easy to cut off friends it is harder for teens to cut off family. Unless you have a really good reason to not go to a friend’s parents (like the parents are abusive) you should always alert them to your concerns. It may cost you a friend; in fact, it will likely cause your friend to reject you, but isn’t losing a friend to get them help better than losing a friend to addiction? If you can’t go to the parents go to a school counselor, teacher, church leader, or other trusted adult. If you know the name of your friend’s doctor you may even consider making a phone call to him/her. You can get help for a friend anonymously; make an anonymous phone call or send an email from a public account that you set up for one use. No matter what you need to alert adults. Taking on an addiction is not easy and you need as much help as possible.
Too many teens turn a blind eye to their friend’s addiction because they don’t want to “sell out” a buddy or “be a rat”, but people who are struggling with addiction are in no position to help themselves. They often have to hit rock bottom before they reach out for help and by that time many of the people best able to help them have been alienated from their life. Drugs and alcohol can become a serious problem no matter what your age and the sooner help is given the better the chances of recovery. Addiction lasts a life time. There is no quick fix. There is no easy way out. But you are not being a friend by silently sitting by and watching a friend spiral deeper in to addiction. If a friend were drowning you wouldn’t even think twice about helping them and calling 9-1-1. Addiction should be treated the same way. Think of confronting them about their problem as diving in to stop them from drowning and think of alerting adults as calling 9-1-1 for help. They are exactly the same. If you think a friend is suffering from addiction don’t stay quiet, act to help them; it is what a real friend would do.
