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What's Mutual Masturbation?

Your Most Embarrassing Questions Answered


Most people know what masturbating is (and if you don't, here's the scoop), but the words "mutual masturbation" might raise some questions for you. I've done my best to answer some of those questions below.

What is Mutual Masturbation?

Mutual masturbation means self-stimulation (a fancy term for touching yourself) in front of your partner. There's no one correct way to do it - it can be done, lights on or lights off, one at a time or together. It's all a matter of what you and your partner are comfortable with.

How Can It Be Masturbating If Someone Else is There?

It's true - masturbating is usually something that people do by themselves. But it's still called "masturbation" if someone else is in the room with you.

Why Would Someone Do That?

Because it's a sexy thing to do with your partner that doesn't have any physical risks. And because it can be fun and intimate in a way that other types of sex are not.

Is Mutual Masturbation Safe?

As far as sex goes, mutual masturbation is just about the safest sex you can have. There's no real contact between you and your partner, so you can't get pregnant or spread STD's. But as soon as you start touching each other - with your mouths, your genitals or even your hands - you're at risk for spreading diseases.

So There's Nothing Wrong With Mutual Masturbation?

Well, just because there are no physical risks, it doesn't mean that mutual masturbation always a great idea. If you feel pressured into doing it, or if you're not 100% if you're ready to share that part of yourself with someone, it can leave you feeling as bad or as emotionally scarred as you would if you'd had other kinds of sex.

If I Masturbate With Someone, Am I Still a Virgin?

Maybe, maybe not - it all depends on how you want to define "virgin." Most people think of losing your virginity as engaging in penetrative sex (vaginal sex, oral sex or anal sex), so by their definitions, you can mutually masturbate with someone and still be a virgin. But whether or not you want to call yourself that is up to you.
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