What Age were You?
17.
What Kind of Kiss was It?
Simple, tentative, regular.
Who and Where?
It was with a boy from school I've been going out with for a couple of months, and we were seated on a bench at the park near my house.
How Did it Happen?
It was confusing, as in, I felt confused at the end. But I think it was a really sweet moment that I'll always remember.
We were holding hands as he sent me home before he suddenly tugged me gently to a bench at the park. We sat down and talked casually for awhile, but I noticed he was deep in thought and exhaled noticeably before he looked at me with an odd, serious, comtempletive expression and said, 'I want to do something but I don't know if I should..'
'Then just do it haha you'll figure out if you should have later :)'
'...but I'm scared.'
'Aww, why?'
'Because, it's.. this-'
Then he leaned in and started kissing me on the lips so gently I didn't realise at first. I broke away after awhile (I don't think I really returned that kiss) and we laughed for a bit to clear the confusion and awkwardness in the air. It's because he knew I'm not really ready for things like that yet but he just couldn't help it that night I guess. We were both a little shy for awhile but continued talking a bit, before he leaned in again and again :)
Advice
- It was only a week ago, & there is nothing I regret except that maybe I wish I wasn't so uncertain, shy, restrained, uptight... but he has been understanding & patient enough to know that it was my first time & just (& still) need more time :) but I guess I have to learn to just go with the moment & flow & not worry so much! :)
- the ambiance matters a lotttttt. One reason why I wasn't as comfortable as I'd like was because we weren't completely alone (there were some people seated nearby, random people walking around). Although it was dark enough, it didn't feel as special & exclusive as I wanted it to be.